How To Deal With An Angry Alcoholic

How To Deal With An Angry Alcoholic – There is a lot of information on how to help an alcoholic on the road to recovery. And as with most things, some are better than others. We have been working with alcoholics and addicts for over 20 years and we know how difficult it can be to communicate with someone trapped in an addiction.

As recovering addicts and alcoholics, we were those people who seemed impossible to reach. And yet here we are. Hope and a solid action plan are a powerful combination. Read on for 11 tips to help an alcoholic family member or friend.

How To Deal With An Angry Alcoholic

How To Deal With An Angry Alcoholic

You cannot reason with alcoholism, nor can you change it. As painful as it is, alcoholics can use the love you have for them against you. Problem drinkers are master manipulators, often exploiting the kindness and compassion of others for their own gain.

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Therefore, when it comes to dealing with an alcoholic, the actions we must take seem counterintuitive. For example, when a loved one calls you from jail asking for bail, your love for him may lead you to give him the money. The thought of your loved one in jail lands and disappoints. You want to help them.

But the truth is that by rescuing the alcoholic from the situations that they themselves created, they compensate for the consequences of their consumption. Your help prevents them from experiencing the real effects of alcoholism. Preventing the consequences is not how to help an alcoholic.

It is not easy to admit that your love, money, dedication, loyalty, whatever, cannot help an alcoholic loved one. It can be even more difficult to recognize that, in the face of alcoholism, your best efforts may not be enough.

Addiction is contagious. No, we do not mean that you develop alcoholism, but that the disease will absorb in spite of everyone around you. Resentment, fear, anger, jealousy, denial, dishonesty, and independence are just some of the characteristics of alcoholism. And they can also knock you down.

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We’ve seen it more times than we can count, and we’ve been there too. Family and friends begin to interact with the alcoholic just as the alcoholic interacts with the alcoholic beverage. And just as the alcoholic is powerless over alcohol, the family is powerless over their loved one’s disease of alcoholism. Addiction for the family becomes trying to control or save the alcoholic.

Al Anon Family Group, a 12-step program similar to Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), is a great resource for those affected by the disease of alcoholism. When you attend open Al-Anon meetings (they are free), you will not only see that you are not alone, but you will also learn useful and effective tools for dealing with someone else’s addiction.

In almost all cases of active alcoholism, we see, there is at least one relative or friend who continues to support the alcoholic relative financially. Unfortunately, this person can undo all the other efforts that everyone else is trying to do. Because? Because as long as someone with an active addiction has access to money, the motivation to quit simply won’t be there.

How To Deal With An Angry Alcoholic

I need money for rent so I don’t get evicted. I need money for the payment of my car so that it does not recover. Can I have money to pay child support so I can still see my children?

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Of course, they all sound legit on paper, and can even be true on occasion. But here’s the thing: the alcoholic will pull your strings to get what he wants. They know that a mother’s weak point is her grandchildren. They know if Aunt Sally is loaded and they can’t help it. And that money for rent? Yeah, it’s probably going straight to the register at his local liquor store.

But let us say that the circumstances are authentic. Even in these cases, the events that caused severe financial hardship are alcohol abuse. By providing money or other financial support, including bail or child support, keep alcoholics from touching funds.

Here’s the bottom line: Most alcoholics won’t get sober or consider themselves sober unless they face serious consequences in their lives.

Be suitable to help them financially. But while it’s not always a good idea to help an alcoholic. If you’ve wiped out your savings, taken out a second mortgage on your home, and called in whatever financial favors you can to send your loved one to your fourth, tenth, twentieth (yes, that’s real) treatment center, to do some You ask tough questions about whether the “help” you are giving is helping.

Drunk Young Man Sleeping And Angry Girlfirend In A Bar Stock Photo, Picture And Royalty Free Image. Image 30160235

4. Find support and ban together. Talk to other family members or friends and encourage everyone to get on the same page.

Even if you are not empowering the alcoholic in your life, there is a good chance that other friends or family members will be. The most effective way to induce sobriety in an alcoholic is to remove the enabling factor. Gather your family and closest friends to chat. Bring literature that you have found useful. Keep the discussion open and try to set strong limits on how you interact with your loved one.

Learning to say “no” to an alcoholic can be one of the greatest gifts we can give them. It is not easy but it is very effective.

How To Deal With An Angry Alcoholic

5. Get help from a professional. If the alcoholic’s life is in danger and they are still resistant to treatment, consult a qualified interventionist.

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A common myth, even among those in recovery, is that someone must want to get help (treatment/rehabilitation) for help to work. It isn’t true.

A trained professional interventionist (sorry, not your niece studying psychology in college), can be a vital resource for you, your family, and the alcoholic. To begin with, they are objectives. They have no emotional attachment to their loved one, just a sincere desire to serve them. Your judgment is not clouded. It means that they will also be able to remain calm and focused if the situation becomes stressful.

Sometimes an intervention, no matter how resilient your loved one may be at the moment, is just what is needed to help an alcoholic begin recovery. Most of us weren’t too excited about getting sober, but once we started, the benefits far outweighed our challenge.

6. Offer to take your alcoholic loved one to a 12-step meeting. Groups like Alcoholics Anonymous can help.

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Twelve Step meetings offer a person recently on the opportunity to find a substitute for her drink. In programs like Alcoholics Anonymous, alcoholics can replace an unhealthy network of alcoholic friends with a group of genuine friends in recovery. They will learn what it means to break old habits, how to take new and better actions, and live by spiritual principles (think honesty, responsibility, integrity, and humility). Supporting an alcoholic by taking him to a meeting can be beneficial to his recovery.

Many family members, especially parents and siblings, feel a sense of responsibility for their loved ones’ alcoholism. We will hear families say: “Where have I gone wrong?” or “It’s all our fault because we got divorced.” But it is essential to know that you are not to blame for someone’s illness. Talk to a professional, such as a counselor, therapist, or social worker, for help in understanding the genetic and lifestyle components of alcoholism.

8. Look for what an alcoholic does, not what he says. Don’t buy “promises”. Let’s see what they do.

How To Deal With An Angry Alcoholic

Alcoholics talk about a good game, but rarely support it. Trust us at Active Addiction, we made tons of promises that we couldn’t keep. So discount their words and watch what they do. It’s a cliché for a reason: actions speak louder than words.

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Constant exposure to the disease of alcoholism takes family and friends on an emotional roller coaster. The more you associate with an active alcoholic, especially one who shows no signs of wanting help, the sicker you can get. Give them some space so you have a better chance of staying strong, keeping your boundaries, and providing helpful help when the time comes.

No alcoholic—no person, period—wants to feel humiliated or ashamed. It may seem like an effective strategy to get there, but it is not. In most cases, the alcoholic will attack or duplicate her behavior just to make a point.

Furthermore, alcoholism is not a moral problem. With few exceptions, alcoholics know right from wrong. Surely you even taught them this! But if knowing the difference between right and wrong could solve their problem, then they would have been “cured” years ago.

Advice like “try harder” or “just drink less” are not helpful. Alcoholics suffer from a progressive and often fatal disease. It would be like telling someone with diabetes to try harder not to have diabetes. It doesn’t make sense and they wouldn’t be able to do it no matter how hard they tried.

How To Talk To Your Partner About Their Alcohol Use

Talking to an alcoholic about their problem, especially if you don’t have firsthand experience with addiction, can be difficult. It can often feel like everything you’re saying is falling on deaf ears. Whenever possible, team up with one professional or another

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